I went to live with Mum

expecting to be going to Afghanistan this time last year with AVI. Then the mission was aborted owing to the perceived security risk and I was then without a house and job. I could sense the isolation and had no future. So I increased my Zoloft dose. I had been waking at 3am and pondering am empty future for three days until sunrise so I took three zoloft within six hours thinking I could speed things up. Mum discovered me awake and trying to make sense of this tight imploding head at 3am and she tried to get me over to the hospital but they assured her there was nothing they could do so she fretted until we could get an appointment with her GP about 11am the next day. He put me on an addictive drug Doxepan? until the Zoloft kicked in properly. One in five people in the western world are in my situation. I wish i were not like this and that i had a different makeup but then I would not be me. I asked the cabin crew after the flight if they had sedatives -they didn't - and I asked what they did if passengers became distressed and they said they had handcuffs and a straightjacket. Terrific customer service that isn't it? Handcuffs and a straightjacket would stress the person out more. It's why I hate the imprisoned bears for bile. I imagine their feeling how I felt with three Zolofts. "It is the blight man was born for. It is Margaret you mourn for." GMH.