Oh darling John, what's wrong?

You're so upset.
Oh sweet ever faithful Jan, my most loyal fan. Alas my heart is broken. They don't love me anymore.
Who diddums? Who doesn't love you?
The voters. They are saying horrible things that I'm not likeable like I used to be and that I'm arrogant and not trustworthy.
There there Honeybunch. They're only voters. What would they know. And anyway, at least they're not saying you're mean and tricky like they used to.
Oh, but woe, what am I going to do? I like to be liked. I had such a wretched childhood from being teased for being a four-eyed nerd.
Well. That's it then. We'll tell your childhood myth. Just like Rudd. We'll go on A Current Affair and tell them about your sad upbringing.
Oh really Jan my sweetness? Really do you think it'll work? Oh I knew I could count on you. You turn my sorrow into hope and my darkness into light.
Yes, we'll do that and then also we'll go on Bert's Family Feud - you, me and two of the kids. All those contestants are popular. I'll send in a nomination form today. Bert is so good at building people up and making them feel good about themselves. Let's see how Mr Smarty-pants Rudd like that!