what counts as sport tragic or couch potato

Oi John, y' know how you say you're a cricket tragic? Well what about me, would I be a fishin' tragic? I eat fish 'n' chips. Or would I need to say own a rod or hand line? Would that count towards being a fishin' tragic? What if I owned a tinny and a bait bag and tackle box? And I went out every weekend or so to Keepit or up on the Barwon and I taught me kids to fish. Would that count? And if I scaled and gutted and filleted me fish - would that count? Well what about you John. You tell me you're a cricket tragic. What does that involve? Oh I see. So you've got a presentation bat from the Australian team. Have you got your own bat and box and maybe a ball or two? No? Your old creams? No? Maybe on account of your being interest in the policy side you were Secretary of Greenwich Cricket Club? No? Maybe on account of your kids you umpired their Saturday morning cricket games? No? Well just what is it that you have done to describe yourself as a cricket tragic? I think you're a bullshit artist John. That's what I think. You try to live off the kudos of the game and the players and the spectators by gatecrashing what we have contributed without having put anything in yourself. You've never even paid for a ticket to get in to see a game have you? You've got a hide John. You've got a hide I'll grant you that.