I caught the rat

but he wasn't wearing my undies - maybe he'd just had a shower? My TV broke last night so I was sitting in silence reading a book on the 1812 war between Napoleon and Alexander when this rat appears on top of my bookcase and scampers down the edge and takes refuge behind it. I was too scared to move for a while but after I got up some courage I found some devices for blocking up either end of the bookcase. So he is trapped. I can hear him trying to get up.
While trying to go to sleep I became guilty. That is one of my worst fears - being trapped like those two miners at Beaconsfield or the guy in the Thredbo landslide.
So this morning I opened up the doors and released the rat from his claustrophobic trap. But he didn't run outside. He ran into the laundry. So I still have the rat and my undies are still missing. Why would anyone steal undies? Mobile phone yes; what looks to be a mobile phone yes; but undies? And as for thinking a rat would drag them into a secret cache? Well I did read Charlotte's Web to my classes and Templeton would steal and carry away just about anything. Geoff, that's only fiction, it's not for real. A thief took your undies, get used to it. Be proud. Who else can boast that their undies are worth taking?